lose weight effectively


How you can lose weight effectively.

Why you eat can be more important that what you eat

Many people struggle with the constant battle with their weight, trying to lose weight effectively and reduce body mass and feel fitter and enjoy more energy  is a goal many cannot seem to realise, but there is often an unseen unknown reason why they fail.

Have you ever kept a food diary?

When people write down everything they eat it can be surprising and often some find it very scary to do, in fact some find it very emotionally uncomfortable to do, but it can help you to lose weight effectively

Bad memory or emotional convenience

Most people do not remember everything they eat over a period of time, and you can argue that our memories can conveniently forget what make us uncomfortable.

People who are asked how many cigarettes they smoke will usually lie and give a lower figure rather than face the reality or embarrassment they feel, and it is sometimes the same with food.

People will complain that they can’t seem to lose weight even when they are on a diet secretly knowing they do eat to much, do you know someone like that?

Finding it hard to lose weight?

Recording everything you eat for 14 days can help you understand your eating habits, you must be honest with yourself for it to work, yes it can be scary to do, but remember that the information is not used to punish yourself, but to help you understand what is going on.

If the mountain is too steep to climb, try going around

If you can’t do it, then you may need to rethink your next move to lose weight effectively,  or stay as you are, the choice is yours.

When we eat and why we eat is a complex area and using therapy to help identify the emotional food triggers can help people to renegotiate their thinking and change the emotional responses around food, I won’t lie, it can be difficult to do, but it is possible to find success as many of my clients have.

One common emotional problem stopping people having a healthy relationship with food is low self-esteem and sometimes learned behaviour also plays its part, did your parents always give you sweets or other food to stop you from crying if you were hurt or upset, or to give you something to eat so you stopped annoying them?

Having therapy can sometimes lead to some surprising discoveries and even change peoples lives, are you worth investing in?

Find help here



How do we cure depression naturally?

How do we cure depression naturally?

Well it seems that just by taking food supplements or natural remedies
and keeping fit people can cure depression, or so some websites and products claim, I do believe that this can help some people who suffer with depression in some instances, but just to claim it cures depression makes me think this is wrong, it must be just another cure-all advertisement, to make money based on dodgy ideas or unfounded research for pulling in the cash from desperate people.

And what type of depression are they talking about, Major depression or Dysthymia for instance? not all depression is the same.
What makes me sad is that some people suffering with depression will try
anything to find a cure or find release from the suffering they have
come to understand as depression. unfortunately big claims are not always what they seem but are in fact just a marketing ploys to part you from your cash.

In some cases natural remedies  could possibly provide some limited help, as will eating a good varied diet and exercise, depression can be a complex and a very personal experience and not to be confused with feeling a bit down or upset. If we could cure depression with such simple practices we would have no people suffering with depression, a cure is just that, like how medicine can CURE some diseases and infections.

Well the unfortunate truth is we cannot cure depression just by using drugs or supplements, normally drugs like antidepressants can help in the short term or when combined with counselling or psychotherapy, but supplements on their own are not going to provide any benefit if you eat well.

If your interested in using supplements or natural remedies remember
that even if they can help reduce symptoms or help in other ways, remember what are called natural remedies can actually behave just like drugs and can come with side affects, so remember to check with your Doctor, because even a natural remedy can interact with any medication your taking at the time and lead to some serious consequences.

Eating well and regular exercise is always good for you and worth trying as it will have a positive result in one way or another.


What have you found helpful for your depression?

Need support with a relationship brake up or divorce

Going through a relationship brake up or trying to struggle with a divorce?
It can feel like the end of your world, the emotions involved can be overwhelming and feel impossible to handle, everything from anger and rage to despair rejection and embarrassment, all valid emotions people feel in such hurtful life changing experiences.

Friends and family are an important support network usually offering love care and concern, I say usually because unfortunately some people do not have supportive family’s, sad but true.

In such time being on your own can be a good thing, allowing some time away to heal can be very helpful, shutting the door and having a good cry is what many people do, a bit of me time to feel sad in a safe place is often very helpful now and then.

Some times people going through such traumatic life changes can feel isolated or don’t want to overburden their friends to much so keep some distance, this can leave people to feel lonely and isolated, not a good place to be in such painful times.

Healing takes time, and how fast you will heal will depend on the feelings and emotions involved, the way it ended and the situation that is left for you to cope with, there may be children to consider or there may have to be ongoing contact for other reasons.

This is where online therapy can be very helpful, you can talk in confidence without feeling you are overburdening anyone, express your feelings and thoughts in a safe space, I know talking does help

Hypnotherapy live online?

I got an e-mail asking why I do not provide hypnotherapy over skype?

To be honest I have tried it, I had some volunteers and did a few sessions of hypnosis over skype a few years ago.

It was in general a problematic experience for both me and the client.

A very important consideration was the inability to control the clients environment, instances of people visiting delivering parcels or phone calls could disrupt the session and not forgetting the quality of the client’s equipment, good quality head phones and a comfortable chair seemed to affect the ability to induce a trance state or deep relaxation, as most people at the time seemed to spend the minimum required on a headset and chair.

Also problems with back ground programs like antivirus programs starting up and disrupting the service due to no keyboard or mouse clicks from the client could also be a problem after some time of no interaction.

So yes it does work but as far as charging a fee for hypnosis delivered over the internet live, I can’t provide it as an online service as yet, not without the possibility of upsetting clients and possibly giving them a unsatisfactory experience.

I’M not saying it won’t happen and there are therapists providing that service right now, but at this time for me it’s not an option I feel comfortable doing for the foreseeable future.

Can you change who you are by using online therapy?

Who are you, find out with online therapy
I am?

If I said the way you think and feel about yourself can either help you see the possibilities and choices you have, giving you a sense of direction and control in life, or actually by restricting your ability to see the options you have leaving you struggling to find a way to hold on to your autonomy.

If someone feels helpless to change their situation or circumstances they can become stagnant unable to see a way out, or find any motivation to attempt to change their life, increasing the risk of developing mental health problems like depression.

It is not just about your self-confidence, that’s just an easy way to explain the complex inner relationship between our self-esteem and our ability to interact with the outer world. So all we have to do is think and feel differently and everything is going to be much better? Well yes, and no, your ability to change how you feel by challenging your old ways of thinking can be a difficult transition for most people and this can take time to achieve.

Online therapy can help you say no when you need to
Saying no to others is often about saying yes to yourself

A good way to think about this is looking at why some people who want to say no just can’t, forever trapped in a cycle of saying yes to others when they need to say no, always doing what others want and unable to stand up for themselves, its as if they can only see one possible option.

What stops people from protecting their own independence by saying the word no more often is about the way they think and feel about themselves, if someone has issues around their self-worth they find it harder to say no to someone they see as being worthier than them.

So, if you can change the way you feel about yourself by challenging your thinking and increasing your self-worth, in time you will automatically feel more able to stand up to the people who you now see as equals and as equals they become less threatening and saying no when you need to more often is not wrong.

People can be affected by all kinds of experiences in life such as experiencing verbal physical or sexual abuse, being bullied and even from becoming unemployed, there are many more experiences in life that can lead to people developing poor levels of self-worth or even the more extreme version, self-hate.

You do not have to suffer in silence, this online therapy service can and does help people challenge and change their own ways of thinking and in turn change how they feel about themselves. But I also understand that this can be difficult to achieve and everyone has to be ready to make the necessary adjustments in their own time, it is of real importance that therapy empowers people to make changes and never forces them in to taking steps they are not ready to take, that just sets people up to fail, and that can make it even harder to find progress.

What changes do you need to make in life?


Another new year’s resolution? two common reason why it can fail.

Just a quick thought on new years eve resolutions and how online therapy can help support you to do what you need or want to achieve in the new year.

New Year’s Eve is almost upon us, and this time of year has diverse meanings for people, some see it as a positive new start or opportunity and look at the new year with hope, others live in fear of the future and can see no reason to celebrate, some see it as a time for remembering and reflecting on people who have passed for life and have contemplative thoughts on the events of years gone by, or just acknowledging the passing of time and its importance to them.

What ever it means to you there is no doubt that people often use this time of year to try and make personal changes, anything from giving up smoking and drinking to making promises to get more exercise and finally starting that diet, some people do manage to do what they set out to achieve, but I think its fair to say that the majority don’t succeed, after a few weeks some slip up or give up, why is that when they set a date and feel motivated? There are a couple of common reasons why people fail to succeed.

1/ A lack of preparation.

If you’re not one of the fortunate people who just wake up on new years day and just decide at that moment in time to just stop doing what is not good for them and succeed in doing it, whether its stopping smoking/drinking or being more assertive, then you need an approach that gives you the best chance of making it a successful new year’s resolution and that mainly requires motivation and preparation.

Sometimes you may know what you really want to change, and you want it so badly that you get a knee jerk reaction to do it right then on new years eve, perhaps it is powered by intense feelings of guilt or shame that manifests into an emotional desperation that leads to an ill prepared attempt that turns out eventually to be unsuccessful.

Sometimes making changes in life can be a major task that needs both preparation and support for it to have the best chance of it being successful, just telling people what your going to do loudly is not always a very effective method of motivation, it can just lead to feelings of being seen as a failure later on and that may make it even harder to restart the changes you want to make in the future.

I talk to lots of people who want to make life changes and I find that everyone is unique, people have to take account of differing strength’s and life complications that need to be taken in to account to help them plan and prepare to help them succeed in what they want to do.

2/ Not being truthful with yourself.

This is a complex but important aspect of making personal changes, if you want make a change in life you need to understand why you want to make it, is this what you actually want, or are you only doing what you think others want you to do?

If you are only motivated by society or peer pressure there can be problems with feelings of inner resentment or even anger at having to do something you do not really want to do, not a good motivator for successful change, but still possible to do eventually depending on the overriding reasons.
For instance, if your place of employment introduces a strict non-smoking policy or starts requiring regular alcohol and drug testing for the work force you may feel you have no choice but to make changes or otherwise lose your job, if your doctor warns you that continuing with your life style is killing you, once again you may have to make life changes you do not really want  for your personal benefit.

There is a big difference between wanting to make changes, having to make changes and only making changes to please others.

You could argue that you can make changes at any time in the year not just new years eve., so why not start the preparation in the new year, find some clarity, focus and support with some online therapy, then when your ready, go for it on your terms.

Do you want to increase the possibility of success with therapy? If not maybe you need to ask yourself why is that?

This online therapy service has been helping people to make life changes for several years, why wait, give it a try on your terms with no obligation.


Dreading Christmas, not coping with Christmass.

Dreading Christmas?

Not everyone likes this time of the festive year, what for some is an enjoyable close family occasion can be a time of misery and obligation for others with family arguments and resentments to look forward to.

I just put up a new web page offering a fresh look at dealing with this time of year if you want to make some changes, not the usual tips but a strategy for next year if change is not possible for this year, after all this yearly holiday is almost here and making changes to your life can take planning and time.

If your not coping with Christmass and are constantly dreading Christmas, is it the same every year?Or it is getting harder as every year passes by, why not try making changes?

Help to cope with Christmas


Not forgetting that the New year is soon upon us, a time for change for some and failed attempts for others.

Why not give yourself the best chance possible of succeeding to make the new years changes you want by planning ahead, not just a last minute reaction to feeling guilty, if it is a last minute gut reaction or idea it probably has not been thought through probably to give you a good starting point.

Maybe it’s a new year resolution to give up smoking or to start dieting, drinking less, doing more exercise to keep fit and even being more assertive, yes it can be about making personal changes like saying no more  to others, what ever it is look for ways to find support and build up a plan of action and ask for professional support if needed, My online therapy service has often been used to help people make new year changes.

Do you need some professional support to help you, why not try some online therapy, just a few session may make all the difference between success and more failed attempts.


What spoils your Christmas holiday?

What new years resolutions are you going to try?